21 Things That Are Only Romantic in Movies

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It’s probably for the best that Charlie Kelly would never be approved for financing on a brand new Ford F-150 — he doesn’t have the best track record with large vehicles and brake lines.

The American spirit can be summarized in three words, and they certainly are not “E Pluribus Unum.” I mean, imagine trying to sell a Chevy Silverado with Latin, for Christ’s sake. No, America is the land of “Rock, Flag and Eagle,” as described by the most illiterate wordsmith in the Birthplace of America. Back when Charlie decided that he would not be tread upon in the classic It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia episode “Charlie Goes America All Over Everybody’s Ass,” he psyched himself up with some inspiring patriotic imagery that culminated with him singing those three words with a throat full of liberty and an American flag wrapped around his special head. 

I love Mother Earth. So I certainly dont want her to crisp up and die. I also understand that the whales must be saved, and that our atmosphere should remain whole. Nor am I rolling coal on cyclists and Priuses (Prii?) or believe that wind farms are a liberal, possibly Jewish plot to kill proud American bald eagles. 

At the same time, I feel like you have to enjoy weird things when they happen. Which is why Im comfortable admitting that some ecological messes are, inherently, kind of funny.